Communication of a couple

By: Mochamad Ismail
What is the most important aspect of relationships. Is it the same hobbies, the same religion, or the same prefession? What make us can keeping good relationship. Honesty, getting along or never fighting? Is it the important aspects?

For me, the first thing what we must aware is a communication of each other, tell what you feel, talk frankly what the matters. With respect each other everything will be all right, and healthy relationship is not something odd in our life.

What I write above are what happen to myself with my wife. Almost everyday after office and before going bed or when get dinner we talk everything happen at my office or hers, talk about our children’s need, about household, society, neighbor, whatever which bad or good things we talk about. Off course some distraction can happen when I’m tired there is something I don’t agree, my anger flare up. But there is something good on me is after the anger is stop, I forget it and everything goes on as nothing happen at all. My wife knows that, so when I’m in a big angry she always keep silent. After everything is ok we talk again.

What I always told to my wife is we both have bad and good character, nothing perfect. So, when I was angry please remember my good things, so do you. If you see the bad things only our fighting will never stop till we divorce.

Off course what we should not forget is honesty. How best our communication but no honesty inside communication is useless. Our life is not a politic stage. With talking and honesty I think everything happen will go right.

Any other opinions? You can write down on a comment below. Cheers…

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Broken relationship

By Mochamad Ismail
There is something doesn’t make sense about relationships at my neighborhood. Since the first time I stayed there about 1 year ago everything seems look wonderful. Every Saturday night we gather and hold a free program to strengthen our relationships. Day by day gone, until the last time I realize there is something wrong last days.

The matters is nothing reasonable but I can feel it. The matters is started when one of us suggested to build a gate in the front yard of our living area. I wasn’t at home when the meeting held so I didn’t involved with the decision. As I know not all of us gathered in the meeting just a half members, even less than a half. But the decision was determined. After some days, apparently not all of us agreed with the decision. I understand why. It’s not because of they don’t like but the money is the matters.

For each person must collect the money about 200 thousand rupiahs. It’s too expensive for us. Moreover each of the family still have leasing to the bank and there is still other works like security, roads, water pipeline, etc we have to do. So the gate is not urgent to build anymore. And finally the gate’s plan was cancelled. Friends who agreed and not agreed just keep silent. No more discussion. But since that time, there is something what I feel not the same as before. Our relationships now is not nice....

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People’s character in relationships

By Mochamad Ismail
The social relationship especially what I felt in my social living has changed. The materialistic orientation and individualistic characters become the most characters and…I think it can be a culture unconsciously. Sometimes I thought why it is happened to people around me, Indonesian. Whereas Indonesia is the country where its people are so hospitable and friendly, has the faith of religion. It’s the very thing what the world recognizes about Indonesian.

Is it because of global technology which the culture of one country can influence another? What I mean a culture of one country not definitely suitable to another. A culture of American people is not suitable with a culture of Indonesian, isn’t it?

What about the religion they believed. We believed. I believed. Characters obviously could be stronger than a faith of religion. Smartness, cleverness, richness, could change the role of religion. Why? Never let the character is above of the religion. Never let the richness, the smartness, the cleverness are above the religion. Never! The Religion must control the character.

Who indeed make us successful in career? In business? Who? The answer is our inner heart.

You know what, I’m not the man who always tell my matters to people even to my close friends. But it’s not only mine but people’s matters. I don’t want to bring something sad or something bad to to you. At least better I just go away to find something fresh like going to movie and come back when my feeling and my mind is refresh.

I don’t have any friend in other country to share about this matter. If talking about cultures. What I thought is any places on earth just have the same matters with relationship. It is universal matters of human being. Is it right?

In the deep of my heart, I still hope there must be a change that one day we can keep good relationships with love along with religion loyalty. No matters status, no matters rich or poor, no matters the folks, no matters the nations. I hope…

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